When Should I Hire A Coach?

I think there are two reasons people choose to work with a coach and these two reasons end up defining the "when".  The two reasons are Pain and Promise.

The Promise

The least popular of the two reasons is the Promise.  Usually people will hire a coach when they feel like the promise of their life is not being fulfilled. In other words, when people feel frustrated about the path they are on or that they know in their hearts that they have a bigger contribution to make and they are not currently on track to make it, then the promise of their lives is left unfulfilled.

Sometimes this feels like that age old question: "Is this it?"  Of course, they know they are excited about something but again these clients just can't see how to get from where they are to where they want to be and that "hunger" causes them to ask for help.  Coaching was created to help people fulfill the promise of their lives.

Interestingly enough, as powerful as the promise is, quite often people will just assume that nothing can be done or just hope that things will work out.  Well hope is NOT a strategy for living the life you deserve but it does keep people from asking for help.

The Pain

However, when people are experiencing a level of pain in their lives, they are far more likely to reach for help to make them feel "normal" or healthy again.  

As a result, the "when" of coaching becomes linked to how much pain people are experiencing and when enough is enough.  What are the sources of the pain?

There are many sources of pain in people's lives but in my experience, there are four main ones:

  1. Lack of respect, acceptance, appreciation or progress at work.
  2. Lack of connection, belonging, intimacy or love in their lives,
  3. Lack of confidence or feeling like they aren't good enough,
  4. Lack of security, future hope or a path/process to move forward.

In each of these cases, we are not talking about a mental illness such as anxiety or depression but rather a normal, healthy person's pain to being less than they know themselves capable of being.  People cherish comfort, security, safety and meaning.  The absence of these things creates uncertainty, anxiousness, frustration and a feeling of powerlessness.

The level of personal pain and frustration you are feeling and your tolerance/acceptance of it will define when you ask for help...and coaching is the most powerful means of unearthing what is truly going on and then doing something about it.

Don't Wait

I think the real travesty is how many people could benefit from a few coaching sessions to feel better about themselves, feel more confident, more alive, more vital and more powerful but wait until they are really out of sorts before making the call. What a waste!

There is no need to waste a good portion of your life feeling terrible when coaching can help you get back on track.  Don't wait.  Don't miss a single day.  Get the help you deserve to live the life you want and make the contribution that the world needs.

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